Comfort Zone

There is a lot I do not know. There is much I have not surrendered. I have considerably more growing to do. And the fact is--until Yeshua returns, this will never change.

I am not saying that I am satisfied where I'm at or that I will not continue along the path. I will continue to learn. But there will always be something deeper. I will continue to surrender. But there will always be more to give. I will continue to grow. But there will always be something higher. The more we grow, the more we long for more.

I am learning, slowly learning, that I cannot stop in my walk with God. I cannot become comfortable with where I am at in my faith. I cannot compare myself to the next guy and say I'm doing good compared to him. That only leads to unhealthy envy and stunted growth. It pulls the body down rather than builds up. I cannot count my good deeds, my accumulated knowledge, or my hours in prayer and say I know God. He's not impressed with what I can do. Seems to me that He does His best work in our weakness. And that's hard for me to grasp.

I'm a perfectionist and a rule follower. My nature is to look for the formula I must satisfy or the pattern I must conform to. But I've never found the formula. Perhaps there isn't one. After all, if there was, where would the faith be? We're asked to venture out into the unknown. To follow God blindly, with only the promise that He will never leave us or forsake us. Scary? Yeah.

Every time I get set on plans, God changes them. Every time I think I know something, God shows me how little I really know. Every time I think I'm doing well spiritually, God shows me where I still need to grow. Every time I grow comfortable, God gives my world a little bit of a shake and reminds me that I didn't sign up for a comfortable life. I signed up as a servant and a disciple.