Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Beyond the Words

Remember playing on the merry-go-round at the park? We would always get a group of three or four of us together to spin it around. It's takes a bit to get up to speed, but once the momentum is going, it's hard to stop. At that point we would pull ourselves up onto the spinning circle of death and watch as the world became a blur. That about sums up my thoughts right now. Actually, that describes my thoughts much of the time.

I'm a project person. I'm a jump into the next exciting project before the last one is barely off the ground type of person. The projects quickly pile up and before I know it, I realize that I have overwhelmed myself again. At first I try to hold onto everything. Eventually, I realize I have to cut back. I reprioritize, try to figure out what is most important to me so that I can focus on just one or two (or three) projects. Patience is not one of my strengths--the process begins again and each time I find my priorities come out differently.

Which brings me to globalization / localization. Not sure how it connects, but I'm sure it does. I don't think we were designed to operate in a globalized context. Constantly connected to hundreds of people across the world, having all the knowledge of the world at your fingertips. It's overwhelming. It wouldn't be so bad except it tends to push out our local world. Instead of developing close friendships, we seek a platform to broadcast ourselves. There's only so much space in the world and we're filling it up with noise.

Silence is something we have forgotten. What if there were no words? No Facebook, no phones, no email, no blogs. What if the only way to communicate was through physical interaction? A helping hand. A shove. A fist. A hug. Shared silence. Just something to think about. Words have a place, but sometimes oftentimes we send them off full of nothing but hot air.

So, it seems a bit ironic that I would be blogging about all of this. This is one of my many projects, placed before the eyes of the world. Whether the words are empty or full or something in between is debatable. Even words that mean something can be as nothing when placed in the wrong context (as a cup of water is life to a thirsty man, but nothing when poured into the ocean of people).

Out of all my projects, this is the one that continues through everything. Why? Because there is no goal. There are no boundaries. I am simply free to be me. The Midrash Newsletter used to fulfill this role (it went on for eight years), but I've found the blog gives me more freedom. And if nobody reads it, that's ok. It's enough for the words to be. This is who I am.

I heard someone say once that "we humans are a universe to ourselves." When I look back at the things I have written on Chasing After The Ruach, I see that in just this small glimpse of myself. And then I realize just how little I know even my closest friends. I think figuring out who you are yourself gives you an appreciation for the sanctity and depth of life--and pushes me forward to come to know those lives outside of myself. To hear their stories, to see through their eyes, to identify with their struggles, to share their dreams. To know and be known--is this not what we all long for?

When you step back from the noise and see, really see, the beauty of a human soul, the creativity and handiwork of God in a human being--it is truly a humbling experience. And you realize that it's not about what they do or say or your attempts to change them. It is enough for them to be.

3 comments:

  1. Thank you for these wise words month after month.
    Question how do you click post. My struggle is that of discontentment with myself. I have words and images and ideas that must be shared but I fear to press send because I know myself and I am on fire, rapidly growing in undersanding and revisiting my conceptions again and again and I don't want to lead anyone astray.

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    Replies
    1. That's a good question. I guess for me I look at it in a different light. I believe that each of us has a unique relationship with our Father, guided by the tradition of our forefathers. I also believe that everything is pointing toward the coming of the Kingdom of God and the Restoration of all things. Each of us has a unique role in building that Kingdom. Each of us has a line to add the the grand Story our Creator is writing.

      We have a tendency to elevate "truth" above everything else. The problem is (as you hinted at), how do you really know what is truth when all of us are constantly growing? We can't. So, should we all just be quiet and do nothing for fear of leading someone astray? I don't think so. As stated above, I do think silence is an important quality to learn. But, at the same time, I believe every person has a story to tell. What is your story?

      Because "truth" is so elusive, I tend to place a greater emphasis on honesty. There's probably a lot in my blog posts that isn't quite true; but I do my very best to keep it honest. I think real truth can only come to light in a place of honest open communication. Tempered with humility and love, and placed within the context of the conversation that's been going on for the last 6000 years.

      My encouragement to you is this: Yes, it is a good idea to let ideas settle for a while before posting them for the world to see. Often it's good to discuss things with close friends and family first (there have been times I've let certain people preview certain posts before posting). But, don't fear failure. The Bible is full of stories of people who failed--and God never let one of them down. Abraham, David, Peter, etc. The beauty of the Gospel is that grace shines even through our mistakes and imperfections.

      Your story is important. God created you to be who you are. As I have said elsewhere:
      "Never let the fear of imperfection keep you from chasing your dreams. Life is a journey and we are constantly changing and growing, falling and getting back up. The closest we can get to perfection is being true to ourselves today" -- http://chasingaftertheruach.blogspot.com/2012/04/illusion-of-perfection.html

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